As you turn 6 today...
My dear princess,
This ‘princess’ is something you love being called… I keep forgetting and you keep reminding me that of all the nicknames, you love ‘Princess’ the most… I could not have afforded to forget while writing this letter to you… one is because through this letter, I relive all our conversations over the past one year or so and secondly because, with your princesshood, I also automatically feel like a ‘Queen’… there is also a third and a very compelling reason… that am going to give this letter to you to read this time… you now know to read most words and sentences and its going to be fun to see you read this letter… your first experience of reading a letter written to you surely will be overwhelming..
Now that you are reading this, you must be wondering, what is this all about.. well, sweetheart, this is a small remembrance of the 6th year of your growing up… as much as I have been able to recollect and note down… so that you may relive it all again through my thoughts… so while we try to keep the emotions behind this letter aside for now, we can surely laugh together on the cutest and most crazy things you have done, as you read this…
So one day we were returning from your friend Manya’s birthday party.. this is how our conversation went
You: Ma, can I tell you a secret?
Me: Yes ofcourse
You: Manya has a boyfriend. She just told me. I also want one.
Me (shocked!): Manya has a boyfriend? Who?
You: I don’t know his name, he stays in her building
Me (trying to compose myself): Baby, you also have boyfriends na… boys who are friends are boyfriends..
You: But I don’t have any boyfriend.
Me: In school you sit next to this boy Shounak, he is your friend also
You: His handwriting is very bad, so he cannot be my boyfriend…
Me (still amazed at your clarity of preferences): So what if handwriting is bad. You should not see these things while making friends.
You: No, he is not my friend
Me: Ok. Leave him. How about Papa? He is a boy and he is toh your best friend. So he also is your boyfriend then
You: How Ma? Papa is Papa and Boyfriend is Boyfriend. Aapko samajh nahi aata?
Me: Achha koshish kar rahi hoon samajhne ki… par aisa kya hai joh voh boyfriend karega aur Papa nahin kar sakte?
You: Voh mere saath park mein jaayega, dance karega, joo-sha khelega (some play with clapping of hands), khaana share karega…
Me: ek kaam karo Manya se poocho kahan mila usko boyfriend
You: ok, will ask her.. (conversation ended there)
Papa was not sure how to react to this… generally a girl would look for her father’s character in her boyfriend… here it is going the other way.. To my good luck, I have not heard from you on this again… and am only hoping that you are not keeping it secret from me because you think mujhe ‘samajh nahi aata’…
Another one when I had taken you to a bookstore with me…
You: What does ‘Religion’ mean? (after seeing a section with that name)
Me: Religion defines a set of rules or beliefs which people who belong to that religion follow
You: what rules?
Me: Very many rules. For example which God to worship, like Hindus, Christians, Muslims worship different Gods (felt helpless at my own lack of clarity on this topic)
You: So all these books have these rules?
Me: Yes
You: There are so many rules?
Me: Yes
You: We are Hindu na?
Me: Yes we are (wonder how you know this though!)
You: Why?
Me: Religion of any person is mostly decided by what religion his/her parents follow. Papa and me are Hindu, so when you were born, you became a Hindu too…
You: (after a long pause) I always do what you and Papa ask me to do, so if everyone does what their parents ask them to do, then why read these books
Me: Like you don’t listen to me always, others also don’t always listen… at such times, these books can guide you on what is right and what is wrong
You: Then we can just read these books and not listen to mummy papa at all… (I go blank after this)
Me: Why don’t you pick up one of those books and try reading. If you can read and understand, then you don’t have to listen to me. If you don’t understand, then you have to listen to me, no choice, sorry
You went to that section, spent a few minutes there, and came back only to dig into the books in Childrens’s section. I heaved a sigh of relief…
These were epic conversations between us… there are many such small and big conversations in which you have bowled me over, many times…
This year, we did some amazing travel across some breathtaking places… towards beginning of the year, we drove down to Goa to be with your dearest friends – Vriddhi, Simoni, Manya, Shona, Naina and the cutest bundle added to your gang – Anaya… you always have loads of fun with these girls, whenever you get to meet them (or whenever we parents manage to plan a holiday)… all we did in Goa was play in the pool and on the beach… but this is also when you picked up my camera the very first time and clicked some beautiful pictures… I am liking this streak in you and will make sure you get an opportunity to explore more with the device…
There was another long road trip we did to Lanja-Rajapur-Ratnagiri… these are the places where I have spent best days of my childhood and best part of my holidays… these places still are as untouched and unadulterated as they were in my childhood… you experienced such places for the first time ever… a house made of mud, with water canals running around it, cattle-shed in the backyard, surrounded by fields, river flowing right next to the house… all of it was absolutely fresh and thrilling… and those were my most joyous moments, to have relived my childhood with you, and to let you carry a small part of it in your heart too…
Then came Diwali and this year it was a big-bang celebration… we all went to Allahabad and spent a few days together with our entire family… celebrated Diwali, celebrated birthdays, celebrated the togetherness that happened after a long long time… Daadi, Babaji, Anshoo and Ankoo bua, Amit and Samrat phupha, and our darling Aryaman were all together… to my amazement, you were that grown up, big sister… letting Niky and Aryaman do all the mischief… setting right benchmarks and standards for both of them to follow… Aryaman became your big fan and would need you, his ‘diddi,’ around for everything… the way you win hearts with your subtlety and simplicity is just so remarkable…
That simplicity was also evident when we were planning your birthday this time… I asked you what do you want to do for your birthday… and (to my utter surprise) you did not talk of any party or any gifts… when I asked you which friends you want to invite, your list which used to run into 20-25 names earlier was now pruned down to select 6-7 names… when I called those 6 friends, each one of them knew that it is your birthday today and it was as important for them as it is for you… on receiving the invite, two of them made their parents change their plans to accommodate your birthday… your friendships are growing selective and stronger now… I pray that you are blessed with some really great friendships as you grow, for these are the people which you choose by yourself, you laugh with, you dream with and love with all your heart…
So these 6 of your friends Aanya, Meher, Kshipra, Sachita, Manya, Meghana, had come over to our home today, we had a small celebration at home and all of us then went to see the Circus… when asked how was the circus,
I got a reply in chorus ‘outstanding’… you had great time with your friends and I had great time realizing that I can actually manage so many kids by myself !!
I also have to tell you that you are doing pretty good, infact excellent, in your school and studies. You love going to school, you participate in all activities there, you do your homework on your own and all that is required of a bright student… but more than that, what has made me immensely happy is that you have developed this eagerness and enthusiasm to read… so much so that I wait for you to finish your existing set of books and look forward to buying you more… I have seen your eyes light up more on seeing new books than seeing barbies and I cannot possibly explain how rewarding that feeling is…
Besides, your flair in swimming and tennis is also discerning… you may just be at the beginners level, but your love for these sports, am sure, will take you miles ahead, in the respective games and also in overall attitude and sportsmanship…
So as you see, overall, this year has seen phenomenal changes in you… you have become quieter and calculative… much more sensitive and submissive, more restrained and responsible, very attentive and adept… anything I say is diligently absorbed, remembered and used against me in another argument, even after 6 months… anything I do is keenly observed, imitated and questioned… I have learned to persist, when all I want to do is give up…I have learned to experiment, when I find myself ignorant or unequipped… I have learned to be positive, when I have lost all hope and faith… I have learned to aspire, even when some priceless dream is shattered… all this because I realize I am being watched… with this my learning curve has steepened, in many aspects of life… I know I am not perfect, but when I look at the way you are growing up, and helping me grow with you, I know that I got something in my life perfectly right, its YOU NITHILA…
Wish you a very happy sixth birthday… God Bless
Yours Ma
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